


Milk and Oats

by juicywizard



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Bathtubs, Fluff, M/M, Milk, clayleb - Freeform, clayleb au lait, poison oak
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-17
Updated: 2019-04-17
Packaged: 2020-01-15 09:41:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18496330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/juicywizard/pseuds/juicywizard
Summary: While out on a recon mission, our favorite wizard finds himself itchy and helpless, for which our favorite firbolg swoops in for the rescue.





	Milk and Oats

**Author's Note:**

> Please be advised this is unbeta'd and written late in the evening. Hope you enjoy, and leave some kudos and comments if you do!

Caleb didn’t mean to fall into a bramble patch of poisonous plants. In his defense, it was dark, and he’s _human_ , for gods’ sake. So, poor dark vision paired with twisting,viney brambles on the forest floor make for a clumsy wizard. Thankfully no one had been around when that happened as they were canvassing a small section of the woods behind the tavern they were staying at, hoping to get a lead on where a league of defectors that were terrorizing the town might be.

He tried to ignore the itch that started on his hands, then spread to his neck from a phantom itch, then soon Caleb’s torso was red and blotchy from the whole ordeal. But did Caleb say anything about it? No, because they had a _mission_ , and Caleb would be damned to be the one to cut their recon mission short. He slowed his walking until he was behind everyone, dipping behind a nearby tree to reach under his shirt and get a good scratch going.

“Mister Caleb,” a voice said from behind the tree, startling Caleb who in turn scratched too hard and felt a prick of blood spread on his skin. He peeked around the corner to find Caduceus standing there.

“ _Scheisse_ ,” Caleb swore under his breath, going back behind the tree as he tried to swipe away the blood before moving to face Caduceus.

“Hallo, Caduceus,” He looked up at the firbolg,” _Entschuldigung _, I did not mean to hold you back from the group.”__

__He might have noticed how ethereal Caduceus looked in the moonlight, if Caleb wasn’t so damn itchy._ _

__“Oh,” Caduceus gave the wizard a lopsided smile, “Not a worry. Most of the others are heading back this way shortly as there’s nothing further to be seen. A dead end as leads go.”_ _

__Caleb pursed his lips, trying to fight the bubbling urge to take his clothes off and rub himself against a tree like a wild bear. But that’s almost what got him into this predicament in the first place._ _

__“Oh, _gut_.. I mean, not good but…” Caleb trailed off, distracted by an itch just under his chin, “Um, Mister Clay, have you noticed any plants that may be poisonous around here by chance?”_ _

__Caduceus seemed to thing for a moment before pointing in the direction that they came from. “Actually,” he said, “I saw a bramble patch of poison oak back where we came from.”_ _

__Caleb pursed his lips, and mumbled, “ _Verdammt._ ” That would explain the itching. He felt Caduceus watching him as Caleb inspected his own hands, not much seeing but feeling the splotches of poison oak he must have touched._ _

__

__“Mister Caleb, are you alright?” Caduceus asked, looking down to Caleb’s hands as well._ _

__Caleb shook his head, turned himself around, and headed back in the direction of the tavern. “I need to take a bath. Then I will be.”_ _

__And Caduceus was right next to him without another word. Caleb looked to the firbolg, who shrugged, and said, “I think I can help. I’ve had my fair share of run-ins with poison oak back home. That is, if you’re alright with my help.”_ _

__Caleb scoffed, he’d be amused at the fact that Caduceus already gathered it was from poison oak if this itch would disappear._ _

__“You want to help me…. Take a bath?” Caleb asked, his words marked with the wariness it always carries when someone offers to help him with something. It was just a bath, after all. A bath he desperately needed since now his _armpits_ of all places were itching._ _

__The firbolg gave a small shrug and a gentle smile, “I know a special cure to quell the symptoms. My mother used it on me often when I was small.”_ _

__“You, small, Mister Clay? Sorry, but that is very hard to imagine someone your stature being small.” Caleb smirked. They finally reached the edge of the wood, where the gravel crunched beneath their feet as they continued to walk around to the front of the tavern. Luckily, they were in a bigger town, one with a tavern that also held their own bathing rooms._ _

__Caduceus chuckled softly, but didn’t respond. They walked in silence up to the front door of the tavern, and Caduceus opened the door for Caleb, mumbling something about not wanting Caleb to spread the poison oak to another unfortunate person._ _

__“ _Danke_ ,” Caleb replied, shuffling past the firbolg into the main seating area, and continued to the stairs. He turned to Caduceus and cleared his throat, “Um, by the way, you are welcome to help with this bath situation. I had just planned to use water, but if you have something more… potent, that would be appreciated.”_ _

__A small smile formed on Caduceus’ face, and Caleb’s heart skipped a beat. _Was? Nein, Widogast. Stop thinking of him like this._ It was just a kind gesture, after all._ _

__“Oh, I would love to help. I’ll gather what I need. I’ll meet you up there and let the keep know we’ll be using that room,” Caduceus said,.waving Caleb up the stairs before going to the bar to gather what he needed._ _

__Caleb didn’t stick around, instead going to the room where the tavern kept a large bathtub, large enough to easily fit 3 humans. He noticed that the water was still steaming, which meant the water was recently replaced. Which then made Caleb feel bad for the fact that Caduceus was most likely about to ruin it with this concoction he spoke of._ _

__Caleb took off his coat, dropping it to the floor to then carefully removing his book holster and setting them on the counter next to the small water basin and mirror. He then stripped down to his small clothes and waited for Caduceus like that, itchy and almost nude._ _

__If anyone asked, Caleb certainly did not give in and scratch a few spots in those minutes he waited. And waited._ _

__Caleb almost thought Caduceus wasn’t coming back, but then he heard a jostle behind the door, for which he opened it to find Caduceus with his arms full of pitchers and a decent sized satchel._ _

__“So,” Caduceus started, stepping into the room, setting the pitchers and satchel on the counter, “The keep wasn’t very happy that we’ve taken this tub over as they just refilled it. However, his attitude changed when I offered him money for the trouble, and a little extra for the milk and oats.”_ _

__Caleb stared incredulously at the firbolg, “ _Entschuldigung_ , did you just say milk and oats?”_ _

__Caduceus nodded and smiled at the wizard as he picked up a pitcher and the satchel, walking over to the bath and began pouring the contents of the satchel into the bath. Caleb had the urge to grab Caduceus’s arm and ask him _was zur Hölle_ he was doing, but thought better of it and just let the cleric do his work._ _

__Caleb watched as Caduceus emptied the rest of the other pitchers into the bath before the firbolg turned to him. “Well, go ahead and get in whenever you’re ready. We warmed the milk a bit so it didn’t make the water cooler. I’ll take your clothes downstairs to get laundered while you get in.”_ _

__The wizard nodded, “ _Ja,_ okay. That is fine. _Danke_ , Mister Clay.”_ _

__Caduceus picked up the clothes that gathered on the ground and headed to the door, and added, “Just toss your other items out here and I’ll see to it that those get clean as well.” Caleb nodded, shutting the door behind him to quickly shuck his smallclothes off. He cracked the door open noting the bright pink of the firbolg’s hair in the corner of the hallway as he dropped his things just outside the door before closing it again._ _

__With each step closer to the bath, Caleb felt the itching build up and up, until he was on the top step of the small ladder into the bath. He grabbed the side of the tub to swing a leg over, dipping a toe into the milky water. It was hot, still steaming, the perfect temperature. Caleb sunk his foot down to the bottom of the tub so that he could swing his other leg over and fully immerse himself in this bath._ _

__Caleb let out a relaxed groan, feeling the tension that had been building up melt away with the heat of the bath. More importantly, he felt the itchiness from the poison oak melt away along with it. “ _Ich danke den Göttern,_ he thought, sinking down into the tub to his ears. Thankfully he had the foresight not to touch his face._ _

__There came a gentle knock on the door. Caleb looked down at the milk bath, and having comfort in knowing the milk gave him a little privacy, he called out for the knocker to enter._ _

__It’s not that Caleb was shy about his body, despite usually donning ill-fitting clothing and bandages. In less intimate settings, he was fine with bathing freely. But when Caduceus was the only one in the room with him and Caleb was the only one naked? That’s too much pressure and attention on him._ _

__Caduceus entered the room, itching his palm and forearm sheepishly. “So,” he began, looking down slightly, “I seemed to have found a few leaves caught in your coat and clothing, and it got on me.”_ _

__Without thinking, Caleb said, “Please, join me, then? I mean, _scheisse_ it’s the least I can do since you put this together for me. Don’t let it go to waste on only me.”_ _

__The firbolg looked to Caleb, a curious look in his eye. “You’d like me to join you in the bath? Alright.”_ _

__It seemed so easy for Caduceus to just remove his clothing, as if he had no thoughts making him second guess. Sometimes Caleb wished he could be as careless._ _

__Caduceus stripped to his smallclothes, and then removed those too. Caleb sunk into the water slightly so that the firbolg’s bottom half was hidden by the line of the tub. It’s not the first time they’ve been naked around each other, but Caleb would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought dangerous things about Caduceus and his body before._ _

__“Mister Caleb, would you mind moving slightly? I’d hate to sit on your feet,” Caduceus said, his words penetrating the layer of daze that clouded Caleb’s thoughts. He was attempting to think of anything other than Caduceus. Which was a very difficult thing to do while sitting in the same tub as him._ _

__Caleb moved to the side of the tub, giving Caduceus enough room to stretch out as much as he could. He watched as the firbolg sunk into the water, the way his pink hair tied into a bun got pressed into the side of the tub as his head sunk lower. Caduceus let out a happy-sounding rumbling noise, and Caleb couldn’t help but think how… _liebenswert, bezaubernd, verdammt_ cute it was._ _

__He tried to push those thoughts away as he sunk lower into the water, again to his ears. He closed his eyes for a moment to ground himself. When Caleb opened his eyes again, he saw Caduceus’s lips moving and realized he was trying to talk to Caleb. _Scheisse_._ _

__“I’m sorry, Caduceus, can you please repeat that?” Caleb asked. He notice Caduceus’ face flush behind the light coating of fur._ _

__“Oh, um, I was just asking if… if you wouldn’t mind if I come to your side of the tub? I’d hate to invade your personal space but I always feel like I’m floating away in big tubs like this.”_ _

__Caleb’s brain seemed to short out for a moment. Same side of the tub, okay, he could do that. Two friends, relaxing in a tub. There would be at least a few inches between the two of them. It wouldn’t be weird._ _

__“ _Ja_ ,” Caleb nodded, “That is alright with me.”_ _

__Caduceus turned himself around in the tub and scooted backwards so that he and Caleb were facing the same way, each of then pressing to the sides of the tub. Caleb pursed his lips, realizing that this is not the way he’d be acting if in a tub with say, Fjord or Beau. He let himself relax a little, his thigh seeming to rest against Caduceus’s._ _

__“I just wanted to say, Mister Clay, that I am very appreciative of this bath and what you have done for me this evening. It is much appreciated,” Caleb said, breaking the soft silence._ _

__The cleric smiled softly, lifting his hand to rest on Caleb’s shoulder, “It’s no problem at all. I like taking care of people I care about.”_ _

__Caleb could feel the tips of his ears warm and redden. “Oh,” he mouthed, then said, “I feel honored to be someone you care about, Caduceus.” He felt like Caduceus’s hand was going to burn a hole through his shoulder, and the thoughts of _please move it around me_ weren’t helping. Caleb found himself leaning slightly into Caduceus’s touch._ _

__“I care for all of you deeply. In different ways, though,” Caduceus replied, humming softly for a moment before moving his arm around Caleb. “I care for Fjord, Jester, Nott, Yeza, Yasha, and Beau in the same way.”_ _

__“ _Und ich?_ ” Caleb asked, repeating himself in Common when Caduceus gave him a sideways glance, “Sorry, and what about me?”_ _

__Caduceus gave a light chuckle in response, “Honestly, Mister Caleb, I thought you would have noticed by now that I care for you in a different way than the rest. I think Jester has phrased it as that I have a crush on you?”_ _

__It was so easy hearing those words come from Caduceus, these things always seemed to. Caleb’s eyes widened, and he looked to Caduceus, “ _Was?_ ”_ _

__“I’m interested in you romantically, Mister Caleb,” Caduceus said plainly, as if he were talking about what kind of tea he’d been drinking that day. Caleb couldn’t find the words to respond, so Caduceus added, “It’s alright if you don’t feel the same way.”_ _

__“ _Nein_ , it is not that, Caduceus. Quite the opposite actually,” Caleb found himself saying. Why was he saying this? He’s kept his thoughts to himself for so long, why couldn’t he keep them in now? _Why bring someone into your life who you know may be hurt one day by your actions?_ He thought to himself._ _

__Caleb felt the tips of Caduceus’s fingers at his chin, lifting his head up to look a the firbolg. “Caleb, there’s no need to make this complicated. We don’t have to figure it out all at once if you don’t want to.”_ _

__The wizard took a big breath of air in, and slowly let it out, realizing now how much the bath had cooled down._ _

__“I think… I think I’d like to explore that, Mister Clay. as long as you can be patient with me.” Caleb said softly, looking back up at Caduceus to gauge his reaction._ _

__The firbolg only smiled his relaxed, lopsided smile, and leaned in to kiss Caleb softly on the lips._ _

__“I am nothing if not patient, Mister Caleb.”_ _

**Author's Note:**

> You can thank the clayleb discord server for the prompt "clayleb au lait" that then spiraled into this fic.


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